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本帖最后由 lilyma06 于 2012-3-19 11:35 编辑
【中文标题】让我们扬一扬中国的家丑
【原文标题】Letting an Ugly Skeleton Out of China's Closet
【登载媒体】纽约时报
【原文作者】DIDI KIRSTEN TATLOW
【原文链接】http://www.nytimes.com/2011/11/17/world/asia/17iht-letter17.html?_r=1&ref=china
“家丑不可外扬”是中国最著名的一句谚语，表示一种沉默的态度：不要谈论家里发生的坏事。
Kim Lee却没有谨遵这条教诲，公开了一个令人羞耻的秘密——家庭暴力。8月31日，这位40岁、身材瘦高、黑色头发的Lee女士（虽然姓Lee，但他是个美籍意大利人，她说这是艾利斯岛的名字）在中国的微博上贴出了他淤肿、带血的前额、耳朵和膝盖的照片。这些伤害是她的明星丈夫李阳在他们3岁女儿面前施暴造成的，他们还有两个女儿，分别是5岁和9岁。
中国网民立刻喧嚣起来。李先生因为开创了“疯狂英语”学习方法而家喻户晓，数百万人追随他用最高音量喊出英语（这种方法的口号就是“让全世界听到中国的声音”）。9月10日，他在微博上承认伤害是他造成的。
“我向Kim正式道歉，我对她实施了家庭暴力。”
可是后来，厚颜无耻取代了忏悔的态度。李先生在接受媒体采访时，虽然承认他的确做错了事情，但是说这“不是大事”，家庭暴力是中国传统文化的一部分。今天，他依然在学校和体育馆中面对数千名孩子教授英文，很多人都知道他是个死不悔改的虐妻者。
这一切激怒了妇女权益组织、学者和很多普通人，他们担心这会向年轻一代传达什么样的道德观念。尽管也有一些言论支持李先生，但其他人都给他起绰号，叫“李疯子”，说他辱没了中国。
一个微博用户Zhubinismichong写道：“今天，疯狂英语李阳要来我们学校讲课。恶心！一个崇尚家庭暴力的人竟然当教师！”
复旦大学一位被激怒的犯罪法学专家陈浩然，在上海的一个谈话节目中对李先生说：“你没有最基本的常识，你竟然认为自己的所作所为都是对的。”
反家庭暴力研究中心主任冯媛说，中国传统文化这个理由是站不住脚的。“对于李阳这样一个在现代价值观念中生长起来的人，用中国传统文化做借口是不可接受的。现在越来越多的年轻人都知道殴打和威胁是错误的。”
调查结果显示家庭暴力现场呈蔓延趋势，25％到35％的家庭中都存在暴力现象。大部分受害者是女性，但儿童、男性，尤其是老人受暴力对待的现象也逐渐增加。大约90％的施暴者都是男性。
据政府媒体新华社报道，一家政府机构“全国妇联”在10月份发布的信息说，在接受调查的126000名10岁以上的女性中，有24.7％遭受过家庭暴力，形式包括身体、性、精神虐待，还包括“经济控制”。
3月份，冯女士的组织再次发布了一份2004年的调查报告。这份与“中国法律社会”合作针对浙江、甘肃和湖南省的调查中显示，34.7％的家庭存在暴力现象。
新闻媒体也曾经报道，有8100万家庭，也就是中国2.7亿家庭中的30％，选择忍耐家庭暴力。这个数据在2006年得到了一家学术期刊《社会》的印证，它也发现家庭暴力的比率是30％。
为反对家庭暴力制定完整的法律所面临的压力越来越大，一些支持者希望明年三月份的全国人民代表大会中可以讨论这个议题。冯女士说，目前，相关的法律的确禁止类似的暴力行为，但禁令分散在各种法律条款中。
她说，必须有明确的法律条款告诉警方和法院，如果受害者寻求帮助，他们该怎么做。Lee女士的经历就是这样做的原因。
当她在不止一次遭受暴力对待后到派出所报案时，警官显得不知所措。Lee女士说：“他们问我：‘你想让我们做什么？’我说：‘你们能做什么？’”
一名男警官坐在桌子后面深深低下头，似乎是说“我们什么也做不了”。一名女警官建议她回家，说事情并没有那么糟。Lee女士说：“我明白为什么女人都放弃了，这太令人沮丧了。”
后来，医院的报告显示她有轻微的脑震荡，因为李先生经常把她的头往地板上撞。她在微博上贴出了X光照片。她说，如果没有微博，她就永远没有机会公布这件事。
Lee女士曾经是迈阿密一个教师协会的代表，她在1999年第一次来中国时遇到了李先生，她到现在还不明白自己怎么会变成一个受虐待的女人。她说，当她的头部在孩子面前被撞到地板上时，必须要有些变化了。她对孩子们说：“我不想把他们养大后也遭受暴力虐待。”
Lee女士的离婚诉讼将在12月15日开庭。这条路困难重重——她女儿幼儿园里的一个父亲谴责她是个“危险的女人”；一个年轻男人在地铁中向她吐口水，喊道：“他应该杀了你！”
但她也得到了很多温暖的关怀。在与李先生业务合作多年之后，她的相貌广为人知。走在马路上，很多陌生人向她微笑，还有人竖起大拇指说些支持她的话。一位经营复印商店的老年女士有一次为她复印了几十份资料——出生证明、结婚证书、警方和医院的报告——只收取她1元钱，相当于16美分。这是不可思议的低价格。
11月25日，她将参加国际反暴力侵害妇女日的活动。她计划编写一些预防家庭暴力的手册，发放给中国的学生和反家庭暴力组织。她说：“我知道，作为一个美国人，我算是‘外人’。但是中国妇女不是，我要留在这里帮助她们。”
原文：
BEIJING — “Family ugliness must not be aired” is one of China’s most familiar sayings, reflecting a code of silence that demands: don’t talk about bad things happening at home.
Kim Lee didn’t obey the cultural command and blew open a shame-filled secret — widespread domestic violence. On Aug. 31, Ms. Lee, 40, a tall, vivacious brunette who, despite her name, is Italian-American (“Lee is an Ellis Island name,” she explained), began posting photos of her bruised and bloodied forehead, ear and knees on Weibo, a Chinese microblog. The injuries were inflicted by her celebrity husband, Li Yang, in an attack in front of their 3-year-old daughter. The couple have two other daughters, aged 9 and 5.
China erupted in public debate. Mr. Li is a household name for founding “Crazy English,” a method of learning English followed by millions who yell at the top of their voice. (Its slogan: “Make the voice of China heard throughout the world!”) On Sept. 10, he admitted on his Weibo that he had done it.
“I formally apologize to Kim,” he wrote. “I committed domestic violence against her.”
Contrition has since given way to bravado. In news interviews, while still admitting he was wrong, Mr. Li has said that it was “no big deal,” that domestic abuse is part of Chinese culture. Today, he is still teaching thousands of children daily in mass events at schools and stadiums. Many know he is a largely unrepentant wife-beater.
All this has infuriated women’s rights campaigners, scholars and ordinary people, who worry about the moral message to young people. While there have been statements of support for Mr. Li, others have dubbed him “Crazy Li” and said he demeans China.
“Today Crazy English Li Yang is coming to our school to teach,” a user called Zhubinismichong wrote on her Weibo. “Nauseating! A person who commits domestic violence, teaching!!”
“You lack the most basic common sense,” a riled Chen Haoran, a criminal law expert at Fudan University, told Mr. Li on a Shanghai talk show. “You believe what you did was very correct.”
Pleading Chinese tradition was irresponsible, said Feng Yuan, head of the Anti-Domestic Violence Network, an outreach and research center.
“For a man like Li Yang who has been exposed to modern values to excuse this as Chinese culture and tradition is unacceptable,” said Ms. Feng. “More and more young people today know that beating and threats are wrong.”
Surveys have found that domestic violence is widespread here, occurring in 25 to 35 percent of households. Most victims are women, but children, some men and, increasingly, the elderly, suffer too. Surveys suggest that around 90 percent of offenders are men.
In October, the All-China Women’s Federation, a government organization, said that 24.7 percent of nearly 126,000 women and girls over 10 years old had experienced domestic violence, a broad term that includes physical, sexual and emotional abuse as well as “economic control,” reported Xinhua, the state-run news agency.
In March, Ms. Feng’s group republished a 2004 survey of Zhejiang, Gansu and Hunan provinces, conducted with the China Law Society, showing a rate of 34.7 percent.
The news media often report that 81 million families, or 30 percent of China’s 270 million families, live with domestic violence, a figure supported by a 2006 survey in Society, a scholarly journal, that also found a 30 percent abuse rate.
Pressure is growing for a comprehensive law against domestic violence, with advocates hoping that discussion can begin in March at the National People’s Congress. Currently, the law does prohibit such violence, but the prohibition is scattered among different statutes, said Ms. Feng.
Clear laws are especially needed to tell the police and courts what to do when victims ask for help, she said. Ms. Lee’s experience suggests why.
At her local police station immediately after the attack, which was not the first, officers were at a loss, Ms. Lee said. “They said, ‘What do you want us to do?’ I said, ‘What can you do for me?”’
A male officer dropped his head to his desk, as if to say, “Oh, no,” and a female officer advised her it was not that bad and she should go home, Ms. Lee said. “I understand why women give up. It’s so demoralizing,” she said.
Later, a hospital report showed she had a concussion from Mr. Li repeatedly hitting her head against the floor. She posted the X-ray on Weibo. Without Weibo, she said, she never could have publicized her case.
A former teacher’s union representative from Miami who met Mr. Li on her first trip to China in 1999, Ms. Lee struggles to understand how she ended up an abused wife. Yet something changed that day when her head hit the floor in front of their daughter, she said. “I don’t want to raise them to suffer abuse,” she said of her children.
Ms. Lee’s divorce trial is set for Dec. 15. It’s hard — a father at her middle daughter’s kindergarten berated her as a “dangerous woman,” she said, and a young man in the subway spat on her, shouting: “He should have killed you!”
Yet she also receives much kindness. Her face is well-known from years of professional collaboration with Mr. Li, and, walking on the street, strangers smile at her. Sometimes they give the thumbs-up or words of support, she said. An elderly lady running a photocopy store silently copied for her dozens of documents — birth and marriage certificates, police and hospital reports — then charged 1 renminbi, or 16 cents, an impossibly low amount.
On Nov. 25 she will take part in activities marking the International Day for the Elimination of Violence against Women. She plans to write and distribute manuals on preventing domestic violence to schoolchildren around China, together with the Anti-Domestic Violence Network. “I know as an American I have an ‘out,”’ she said. “But Chinese women don’t. I want to stay and help them.”
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发表于 2011-11-21 12:33
