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http://tieba.baidu.com/f?kz=132267248
there's a princess at the top of a tower which is being guarded by a dragon. You as the protagonist have the sacred duty of saving her. Just because you're a badass. Now we'll see how this situation would be handled according to each genre.
呃，从前有头龙，住在一个高塔中，住啊住啊，不能白住，它还守着一只公主。而你是主角――公驴，爱逞能的――一个大英雄，毫无疑问你要去救出那只公主。那么现在会有怎样的剧情呢？――当然与不同音乐类型是不一样的啦。
HEAVY METAL
重金属
The protagonist arrives on a harley, kills the dragon, drinks a few beers and fukcs the princess.
大英雄骑着哈雷杀死恶龙，喝了点啤酒把公主给×了。
POWER METAL
能量金属
The protagonist arrives riding a white unicorn, escapes from the dragon, saves the princess and makes love to her in an enchanted forest.
大英雄骑着纯白的独角兽，带着公主逃离恶龙的威胁，然后在美轮美奂的密林深处××。
THRASH METAL:
鞭击金属
The protagonist arrives to the castle, he fights the dragon wielding an assault rifle and grenades, he saves the princess and fucks her doggy style.
我们的大英雄达到了城堡，抽出冲锋来福枪和手榴弹一阵突袭，然后救出公主来了个后入式××
FOLK METAL
民谣金属
The protagonist arrives with some friends playing acordions, violins, flutes and many more weird instruments, the dragon falls asleep (because of all the dancing). Then all leave...without the princess.
大英雄（还是大英雄。。。）和大家一起一边演奏着acordion（这个乐器不知道是什么），小提琴，笛子和许多其他奇特的乐器，一边来到恶龙前。恶龙听着听着睡着了。。。他们离开了，忘记带走公主了。
VIKING METAL
维金金属
The protagonist arrives in a ship, kills the dragon with his mighty axe, skins the dragon and eats it, rapes the princess to death, steals her belongings and burns the castle before leaving.
大英雄乘船到达，用一把威力巨大的斧子杀死了那条可恶（可怜）的龙，又把龙皮剥了，把龙肉吃掉了，把公主××至死，抢走公主身上所有值钱的东西，最后在离开的时候将她尸体在城堡前焚烧（算了我还是以后不听维金金属了）
DEATH METAL
死亡金属
The protagonist arrives, kills the dragon, fukcs the princess and kills her, then leaves.
大英雄来了！杀了龙，××并杀死了公主，然后就离开。
BLACK METAL
黒金属
The protagonist arrives at midnight, kills the dragon and impales it in front of the castle. Then he sodomizes the princess, drinks her blood in a ritual before killing her. Then he impales the princess next to the dragon.
我们的大英雄在午夜到达，在城堡前将龙刺穿，然后鸡奸公主，并在她死前喝下她的血，然后像杀死恶龙那样将公主尸体刺穿于城堡前（由此得出一个结论，大家还是听老金属当好孩子吧。。。）
GORE METAL
凝血金属
The protagonist arrives, kills the dragon and spreads his guts in front of the castle, fukcs the princess and kills her.Then he fukcs the dead body again, slashes her belly and eats her guts. Then he fukcs the carcass for the third time, burns the corpse and fukcs it for the last time.
大英雄过来杀死恶龙，将内脏撒地一地都是。××并杀死了公主（可怜地公主，还不如不被救）。然后又奸尸。然后撕开公主的腰部开始生吃内脏。然后第三次××残骸，最后将尸体焚烧殆尽。
GRIND METAL
碾击金属
The protagonist arrives, screams something completely undecipherable for about 2 minutes and then leaves...
大英雄过来在恶龙面前惨叫两分钟然后离开了。。。
DOOM METAL
毁灭金属/厄运金属
The protagonist arrives, sees the size of the dragon and thinks he could never beat him, then he gets depressed and commits suicide. The dragon eats his body and the princess as dessert. That's the end of the sad story.
大英雄到来，估量了一下龙的体形，想到可能无法击败它。于是他与公主一起低落了好久最后决定自杀。恶龙将他们吃掉了――这就是故事结局。
GOTHIC METAL
歌特金属
The princess in a velvet costume starts singing soprano. The protagonist completes the duett by adding the beast part, while the dragon plays the flute. Suddenly he swallows up the pipe and accidently scorches the beauty and the beast and suffocates to death. All their souls are damned in hell's eternity.
一位衣着天鹅绒的高贵公主高声吟唱。英雄来了，为她的歌声添加上对歌中的兽声部分，而恶龙在一旁演奏竖笛。突然它吞下笛子将公主与我们的英雄烧成了炭。他们两人的灵魂从此在地狱中备受煎熬。
PROGRESSIVE METAL
激流金属
The protagonist arrives with a guitar and plays a solo of 26 minutes. The dragon kills himself out of boredom. The protagonist arrives to the princess' bedroom, plays another solo with all the techniques and tunes he learned in the last year of the conservatory. The princess escapes looking for the HEAVY METAL protagonist.
大英雄一显身就弹了二十六分钟的solo（－。－b）。恶龙听得不厌烦了只好把他杀了。大英雄又来到公主窗前，用在音乐学校中最新学来的另一种技术另一种方法又弹了一遍solo。公主被吓跑了，满世界的寻找那位重金属英雄。
INDUSTRIAL METAL
工业金属
The protagonist arrives wearing greasy overcoat, makes an obscene gestures towards dragon, and gets escorted out of fairy tale land by security guards.
大英雄穿着一身油腻的大衣到来，对着恶龙做了一个猥亵的动作，最后被神话故事中的保安架出了神话世界（－。－ 这从头到尾都是在册战车啊。。。）
SPEED METAL
速度金属
Suddenly there, short solo, dragon is confused, someones screaming weird stuff, princess realizes she's been deflowered, dragon and princess are still looking for the one who did this.
突然！那里出现了solo声！恶龙被迷惑住了，有人开始狂叫着奇怪的歌词。公主意识到自己曾经被夺取了贞操（？？），于是公主和恶龙一起寻找着是谁在唱歌（狂叫）。
CHRISTIAN METAL
基督金属
The protagonist rides in on his way home from church and sings a mushy power ballad to the dragon about how much Jesus loves him and that the dragon should turn to Him. The Dragon is immediately converted, and when the princess wants to 'thank' the protagonist he replies, "sorry, but I don't believe in having sex before marriage."
大英雄开车驶在从教堂回家的路上，然后开始哼哼唧唧得向恶龙唱一首颂扬天主多么多么稀罕你的民谣，并且想要让恶龙转而信上帝。恶龙瞬间被转化了。公主想要“感谢”他，可是他说：“不，我在婚前不叉叉。”
GLAM ROCK:
？？什么什么rock
The protagonist arrives to the castle. The dragon dies of laughter when he looks at him and lets him in. He goes and steals the princess’s powder and lipstick. Then he convinces the dragon of painting the castle pink and to get some highlights.
大英雄来到城堡前。恶龙看到他狂笑至死。他进入城堡后偷走了公主的化妆的粉底与口红。然后想要将城堡漆成粉红好显出一些亮点。
BATTLE METAL
战役金属
The protagonist arrives with a legion of a hundred brave footman, war chariots and a dozen elite warriors and, as a master tactician, flanks the dragon in a bloody siege that lasts six hours. The princess gets bored.
大英雄作为战术大师带领一支勇敢的由步兵，战车，精英战士组成的军团达到城堡，夹攻巨龙的血腥战役持续了六个小时――直到公主不厌烦了。。。
NU METAL
新金属
The protagonist arrives in a run down Honda Civic and attempts to fight the dragon but he burns to death when his moronic baggy clothes catch fire.
大英雄开着小本田想要攻击巨龙，然后巨龙喷出的火焰燃着了他身上可笑的宽衣裳――他被烧死了。
EMO
情感（不要翻译就说是emo好了。。。）
The protagonist sees the dragon and moans about how hard it will be to get the princess to fall in love with him, he gets eaten. The princess is very happy, because he was a whiny fag anyway.
大英雄对着巨龙开始哼哼唧唧地哭诉他多么多么稀罕公主。他被吃了。公主很高兴――这个该死的长舌男同终于死了。 |
定义, 戏说, 搞怪, 摇滚, 定义, 戏说, 搞怪, 摇滚, 定义, 戏说, 搞怪, 摇滚
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狗仔卡
发表于 2009-6-4 17:39
提升卡
变色卡
抢沙发
千斤顶
显身卡
发表于 2009-6-4 20:24
楼主
，外人一般称之为交响金属吧
大英雄骑着一条纯白的龙降临了，白龙喷出一道银色火焰将恶龙烧毁，大英雄救出公主，
然后……（后边的各位自己想象吧
）